Questions for couples about intimacy and closeness

Intimacy is hardest to talk about when you have no way in. These are a way in — about communication, not technique.

15 questions

Talking to each other during sex

Talk about how you communicate during sex. How can you improve it?

  1. Do you feel comfortable expressing your desires during sex with me?
  2. Are you more open to communicating your desires and boundaries before sex or during?
  3. Are there times when you feel I am avoiding talking about sex? When does it happen?
  4. How do you signal that you're feeling either comfortable or uncomfortable during sex?
  5. During sex, are you more likely to use verbal or non-verbal communication?
  6. Are there specific words or phrases you like saying or hearing during sex? What are they?
  7. What do you think about talking dirty towards your partner?

Desire and body acceptance

Our bodies are our most intimate gift. How do you see yours in terms of sexual desire?

  1. What do you like the most about your body?
  2. Are there things about your body you would like to change? Why?
  3. What do you like the most about my body?
  4. What do you consider the sexiest part of your body?
  5. How important are compliments about your appearance to you?
  6. Do you think I appreciate and highlight enough what I like about you?
  7. Are there actions or words that make you feel uncomfortable and self-conscious about your body? What are they?
  8. What do you do to feel good in your own skin?